A Letter To Myself and Gut Check

Bear with me on this post.  I have really been struggling with myself lately and my quest.  I have the workout routine figured out in a way that I can tolerate and make it through on a daily basis.  I have given myself permission to take a night off from my second workout once a week if needed due to busy schedule or tiredness.  The part I've been struggling with the most lately is the food.  Not that I don't like the food that I'm eating.  I really do like the food I'm eating and have found many new items that I like.  My struggle with my cravings, sometimes giving into those cravings (sometimes with Munkee's knowledge, sometimes not).  Since I allowed myself an indulgence into food I hadn't had for almost two years I found my cravings coming more frequently and my desire to satisfy those cravings raising.  I have found myself sneaking food, sometimes good food and more times then I'd like to admit, sometimes not so good foods.  It's the giving into those cravings that is causing me problems.  I let that door open once and it's like someone has their food in the door and I can't close it.  It's not that I've put weight on, thanks to the second workout but I am not progressing the way I should be to the finish line.  It is time that I stomp on that food and slam the door shut and lock it with multiple locks.  This is not to say I will never have extras but they will be proper extras that are planned and not hidden and eaten in the car.  They will not be rewards.  They will not be to be satisfy an emotional state or stress I'm dealing with.  The will be to try something new or have something I wouldn't make at home (looking at you sushi) and be done in a way that is good for me.  So now I want to write myself a note to keep with me as a reminder of why I'm doing this.  What I didn't like about my life 26 months ago.  How far I've come.  This is me putting on my big girl pants, pulling up my socks and sucking it up buttercup.  No more excuses.

Melissa,

In August 2013 you took part in a fan experience for Murdoch Mysteries, what should have been a super exciting day for you turned quickly sad as you looked through the photos of yourself with the cast and crew you met.  You saw very clearly the effects your current lifestyle was having on you.  You knew if you continued down this path you would put yourself into a very early grave.  You spent the next week planning a new lifestyle for yourself.  Working out an eating and exercise plan that would change with you as you went on your quest to be the healthiest Melissa possible.  Since that time you have amazed yourself with everything you have done.  You workout most days twice a day.  You eat foods  you never would have looked at twice.  You have proven yourself stronger than you even thought possible.  Life stresses will happen.  Your inner voice will try to convince you to revert back to old habits.  You have the strength to deal with the stresses in a healthier way then eating them.  You have the strength to tell those voices to go to hell.  Stumbles will happen but it's how you pick yourself up afterwards that's important.  You have set a goal for yourself and have been working towards that goal for over two years, now is the time to focus, remember why you're doing this and get it done.

You are lucky enough to have an amazing husband who supports you, will help pick you up when you stumble and only wants to see you succeed in your goal.  You have also surrounded yourself with supportive friends and family members.  Trust in that support system to see you threw challenges and celebrate with you (not with food) when over coming the challenges.

You have got this.  This should be the easiest part for you.  You know what you're doing.  You just have to remember why you're doing this and not let the negatives drag you down. 

You've got this

August 2013

August 2015

YOU HAVE GOT THIS

Melissa

Two Year Anniversary

It was two years ago today that I started this quest to get healthier.  To change my lifestyle.  To take control back of my life.  In the two years since I made this commitment to myself I have pushed myself further then I ever thought possible, I have tried new things I never thought I would try and liked them and I have relied on the love and support of my family and friends more than you can imagine.

Two years ago I took part in a Murdoch Mysteries weekend, I was so looking forward to the weekend and then after, looking at the pictures I got smacked with reality.  I was eating myself into an early grave.  With the support of my amazing husband I made lifestyle changes and am in a much healthier place.  Here is my picture from two years ago.

This past weekend I was able to go back and retake my picture with some the amazing cast of Murdoch Mysteries.

What a difference two years makes!  Here is another one of the transformation.

Other than reaching the two year mark I am also celebrating another milestone that I have been waiting for.  I am now officially have the size I use to be.  Yes, that is correct, I have lost an entire me!

I will try to get better about writing weekly blogs.  The last few months have been a struggle for me as the scale hasn't been always showing me what I wanted to see and I have been questioning my resolve.  With the support of Munkee I am still pushing forward and still moving ahead.  I am about 24 pounds away from where I want to end up and even that is still a question as I want to ensure my final weight is manageable and realistic.

So I want to share a few things I've learned in the last two years:

1. I am not on a diet, I have changed my lifestyle for the better
2. It takes a lot of work to plan and prepare the food you need but it's better for you
3. It's not easy, don't let anyone ever tell you it's easy to make the changes
4. With a lot of determination, support and will power you can make the changes and can get yourself healthier
5. Mushrooms and onions aren't yucky!
6. Sushi is good
7. Eating too much sugar after little to none is a bad thing (will have to share that story some time!)
8. If I can do this, anyone can.  Trust me.

Do You Remember Me?

Do you remember me?  Did you miss me?  Did you think I had fallen off the wagon?

I'm still here, I'm still moving forward on my quest to be a healthier me.  I'm still making progress. 

I hit a wall.  The winter was very long and very snowy.  My weight loss stalled.  Down for a bit and then the same for a few weeks.  I got sick of trying to stay positive when I was frustrated.  I took some time to step back and reevaluate the purpose of this quest.  Weight loss is a great side effect but the ultimate goal was to be healthier.  I am most certainly much healthier than I was two years ago.

One thing I learned on this quest is that it is unpredictable and as much as I'd love to lose weight every week, it won't happen and I need to be ok with that.  I'm still learning to accept this but it's coming.  This last little bit will be the most difficult to lose as it's been with me the longest.  I will have to have faith in the path I have taken, know that I am doing the right things with my food and exercise.  I continue to change up my workouts regularly and add weights to the weighted vest I wear.  I continue to try new foods and look for healthier ways to eat.  I am now addicted to lettuce wraps and most of my lunches are on lettuce wraps.

I still struggle with cravings.  I don't know that those will every really go away but I deal with them.  Talk through them with Munkee and friends.  I have come too far.

I recently went to my doctor and she is happy with where my weight is but I still have a bit more to lose.  I want to make sure that I'm within the normal range of the BMI before I start maintenance.  I'm close but not there yet.  So I guess I should give an update as to where I am.

As of this very morning I am down 153 pounds.  

I still find that very amazing to say and still don't believe it really.

I will try to get back to writing weekly and giving an update.  The last three weeks were crazy busy for my and I'm happy to say I have a few days off to regroup and relax a bit.  So looking forward to it!

Weekly Weigh-in and Eye on the Prize

So here we are again, time for the weekly weigh-in reveal....

As of Saturday I am officially down 141 pounds.  That's another 2 pounds down and another 10 pound ribbon!

I am getting closer and closer to the finish line.  I am getting excited to see the end.  I know when I reach the end I will still have to exercise and watch what I'm eating but I will get to eat a bit more to maintain and hopefully exercise a bit less.

I seem to be accepting the second quick workout at the end of the day.  I know that the results will be well worth it in the end.

I have had to go out and get some new clothes as my current clothes are getting a bit big on me.  I have been trying very hard to not continue to wear clothes that are baggy on me as it does not show off my hard work.

I continue to explore new foods.  Last week it was black bean pasta.  It was just as good as regular pasta and a nice lower calorie high fiber option.  I have also been adding mushrooms regularly.  I have added it to my stir fry and eggs and am going to try it on pizza next!  Who would have thought I would be eating mushrooms and asparagus and tofu and tempeh.  I really have opened my mind to new things.  Not always successful but most of them have been.

I continue to try and prep for dinners the night before trying to keep dinners not too late.  It seems to be working well.

This week should be pretty much the same.  Only challenge is food at work.  St. Patrick's Day and possible treats and then a pizza lunch.  Being so close to the finish line will help keep me focused on my goals.

Still Here

Hello!

I know it's been a couple of weeks since I last blogged.  I needed a bit of a break.  I think the winter blahs have hit and I have been really busy.  So let's give an update.

As of yesterday I am down 139 pounds!  That's two pounds down since the last time I blogged.  I'm very happy about it and it's nice to see progress still happening.

Since the last time I blogged I have added a second workout to my day.  It's 20 to 30 minutes without weights at the end of the day.  The time range is because I do one extra exercise on days when I'm not working to make up for not doing the stairs on those days.  I am in the home stretch, well compared to where I started!  I will continue to have to push myself and keep the eye on the finish line.  I draw strength to move forward from Munkee.  He keeps pushing me as he knows I can do it and is there to pick me up when I stumble.  It's been the best support I could hope for.

The biggest challenge I faced in the last two weeks was my birthday.  I debated for a long time as to whether or not I would have a cupcake on my birthday.  I have been dealing with hunger and cravings for the last week and was afraid I would not be happy with a cupcake.  I spent last Sunday baking.  I made two kinds of cupcakes and two kinds of muffins and biscotti and meringues.  The muffins and biscotti and meringues are in line with my lifestyle and for my birthday I did allow myself a couple of treats.  I shared the cupcakes with family, friends and coworkers but did not have one myself.  Looking back I probably should have because after my birthday I started sneaking a few of the lifestyle friendly treats.  I gave into my cravings and hunger.  By Friday I was feeling guilty and confessed to Munkee what I had been doing.  I will continue to bake healthier options but if I want to have them I will account for them properly.

I am looking for ways to make recipes healthier so we can enjoy some of our favourites without all the not so good stuff in it.  Munkee will be a bit of a guinea pig for me as I try different flours and sugar substitutes.  Looking for ways to be in more control of what we're eating vs. the store bought options.

I am very much looking forward to winter being over so I can go out for walks on my lunch and see the sun again.  Supposed to start warming up this week so hopefully that will be sooner rather than later.

Weekly Weigh-in and Reflection

I know, I know, a day late.  I was VERY busy yesterday so please forgive me.  Without further ado here we go....

My weight loss total as of yesterday was 137 pounds.  Yep, I stayed the same.

Staying the same is way better than going up!  I'm in the final stretch and my resolve is being tested but I am committed to staying the course and getting to the finish line.  I refuse to let the last stubborn pounds get the better of me.  I may need to add some more time to my workout but this is going to take some juggling as I really don't have extra time in the morning.  If it was nicer out I could walk at lunch or after dinner but right now is just too cold and too snowy.  I will probably add some time to Wii fit after dinner.

Something else I did this week was to try and get prep for dinner done the night before so that dinner was getting done earlier than if I had to do all prep and cooking that night.  I don't like eating dinner too late and on days when I don't work I can manage this very well but when I'm working it doesn't always work out that way.  I'm trying to find ways to make it night so late for eating.

My other challenge this week was a baking job I had.  As I've said, I LOVE baking.  It is my happy place and I'm getting better and better at not being tempted by the stuff I'm baking.  I make a cake and cookies for a baby shower my friend was hosting.  It was a busy day yesterday getting everything done but I enjoyed it.

This up coming week I have nothing planned that I know of.  It may change as the week goes on but so far so good.

Weekly Weigh-in and Reflection

Better late than never?

So as of yesterday I am down 137 pounds.  That's another pound down!

This week was pretty good.  Fairly routine and nothing over the top.  I have stopped eating the extra cashews I added last week as my weight was stabilizing and I need to keep going down.  I have started looking for alternative protein sources to find low cal but yummy alternatives.  This week I tried Tempeh.  Took a bit to find it in the stores but I had it in place of bacon on my BLT and it was good.  I felt full after and I didn't mind it.  I am not switching to vegetarian but they do have some good alternative protein sources that I can incorporate into my routine.  

The only challenge this week was Valentine's Day yesterday (hence being a day late in posting this) and extra treats around the office.  Oh wait, I baked some of the treats for the office!  I'm finding it getting a bit easier to resist the temptations because I am enjoying the food I'm eating and I like sticking to my plan for the day.  Yesterday Munkee and I had a bit of running around to do  and decided to pick up lunch to bring home.  I normally would get a 6 inch ham and turkey sub but I find I am getting stingy with my points so instead I got a salad with chicken so I could save the points of the bun to use for extras with the salad.

It's finding that balance and being happy with what you are eating.  It's a learning process and you have to adjust as you move forward.  One for variety and two because items change in the stores.  That on annoys me!  You get use to one item and then suddenly it's gone (looking at you Fiber 1 chocolate peanut butter brownies).  So then you left standing in the grocery stores reading labels and trying new things.

I have to say the one really good thing about this quest I'm on is that I have been forced to try new things.  Most of them have been successful and some haven't been so successful.  But in the last two months I have tried things I would have never thought of trying over a year ago.  I guess we all grow up eventually?

This week I plan on hibernating as it is very cold and snowy right now and that is not motivating for wanting to do much at all besides curling up on the couch and watching tv!

Saturday Weigh In - Definitely made the right choice

I weighed in at 186 for the 3rd week in a row. The fact that I have stabilized the weight for now is actually working perfectly. I have seen major changes in the structure of my body. All of the mass I built up is now being refined.

I took this point to sorta reset the board and clean up the phase 1 of muscle building. At first I wasn't sure if I made the right decision then I started to see the 6 pack (without any sort of straining or sucking in my tummy) It has started to show with me at rest. I have also noticed sculpting in the arms and shoulders more than I have.

I will continue this way for a while and then start adding protein and more activity. It will become somewhat of a cycle. Add mass -> refine mass -> repeat. I set a very high bar for my goal for the year. I fully intend to get there in a sustainable manner. By my 40th birthday I should look roughly like a marvel superhero. (just not the hulk, although I like green alot there is such a thing as too much of a good thing).

I am doing this slowly to allow my metabolism to be relatively stabalized throughout. There is no point quickly adding the bulk without also tempering my body's natural response to it. In the end I want to be able to maintain the new body without a regiment that involves 3-4 hours a day in a gym and eating like a member of a viking horde mid plunder.

So far so good, pleased with how it is going. And happy valentines day to my wonderful wife, I couldn't do any of this without you.

Weekly Weigh-in and Reflection

Well here we are again, Saturday and time for my weekly weigh-in.

So here we go, as of today I am down 136 pound.  Down a pound this week.  Yay!

I still don't think the scale is fully reflecting the changes I have seen but there are many factors for that this week.  I made a few changes this week to try and react to what my body and the scale are doing.  I added 5 more minutes of cardio to my routine so I am now getting up at 5:00 am every day and doing an hour and two minutes of exercising.  Crazy.

The other thing I changed this week was adding an ounce and a half of cashews to my breakfast.  I did this for many reasons.  Lately I have been focusing so much on food and the stuff I'm not having and dreaming of having an all out f-it day.  I was finding I was waking up hungry and my stomach was growling through my workout.  I've also been finding that I get freezing cold at my desk.  The scale also hasn't been showing the changes that I am seeing in the mirror.  The added cashews have really helped.  I'm not as hungry.  I'm not as cold at my desk.  I'm not obsessing about food and wanting the foods I know I shouldn't have.

This just illustrates how important it is to listen to your body and adjust and fix as you go.  Obviously my body has changed significantly with the 136 pound weight loss and I need to eat for the body I have now, not the one I had before.  

That's about it for the week that just passed.  Coming up is Valentine's Day.  That will mean treats of all kinds out at work but I feel more prepared to pass them up now.  I know what Munkee and I will do for the day will fit in with our new lifestyle, the bigger concern for me is what I'll be seeing at work.  I have survived many holiday temptations and this one will be no different.

Weekly Weigh In - Sometimes status quo is deceptive.

I stayed the same weight this week at 186. This is an interesting thing. If I were only to pay attention to the scale nothing has changed. I know that isn't the case however, due to my new tendency to check myself out in mirrors. I have seen changes over the week particularly in my arms and abdomen. I can feel muscles have alot more density. In the abdomen I can more clearly see that defined 6 pack of abs than ever before.

The adjustment I made to my training is working. I am starting to see clearer definition, which was the goal of this change. Its more of a stop in gaining mass to sculpt what is there and refine it. Then I will work on more mass, then switch back to define that.

I am visualizing the process somewhat the same as rings on a tree, building the muscle layer by layer and perfecting each layer as I go. I never thought that would be an aim of mine. I have said before that I am more of a sit and watch movies, sit and play videogames, guitar, or program a computer type of guy. I like less physical activities.

I still hate working out, I think the difference is I have come to accept it as part of my morning. I haven't minded the food we are eating in the slightest so that hasn't been a problem. I do not like the sweating and strain of exercise as a first choice. It was a big challenge coming to realize that it was a completely necessary part of a balanced lifestyle. I have met that challenge, I can accept that it is needed, and do it every day without fail.

Weekly Weigh-in and Reflection

So it's that time of week again, time for the weekly weigh-in and reflection.

So here goes....

I'm down 135 pounds, still.  Yep stayed the same.

I know there are changes that aren't being reflected they way I would like them to be on the scale.  My clothes are looser, I am seeing noticeable changes when looking in the mirror and I am getting comments from my new coworkers asking if I've lost weight.  I know that my body has changed even if the scale doesn't show what I want it to.  I have to be patient, trust the process and know that I am doing the right thing and continue down the path I started 17 months ago.  I will succeed and I will get to the finish line.  I will not give up.

I'm sure as Munkee reads this he'll smile as this was not my attitude this morning.  I would love to be losing 2 pounds a week steady but it's not going to be that way. I do get moody when the scale isn't showing what I'm seeing in the mirror.  Munkee does his best to try and calm me but I'm not always open in the moment to his words.  It takes me time to process and move on.

I have been struggling lately with urges to have a cheat day, have an "f-it" day and just not care for a day.  In my weaker moments I would love to sleep in, not work out, not weigh and measure my food and not care about what I'm eating.  In my head I think I could do that for one day and then the next day be right back at it.  In reality I know this wouldn't be the case.  In my past attempts I have allowed myself cheat days and I started to find more and more excuses to have them more and more often.  As I have said it's a slippery slope with me and the path I have chosen isn't always the easiest but it has been so worth it.

I went shopping with my sister today and bought a size smaller in clothes figuring they would fit soon and have them as something to work towards.  I tried them on when I got home and to my surprise, they fit.  Yep, it's working.  Just have to stay the course, adjust the workout when necessary, add the weights the vest when it's time and keep tracking and monitoring my food.

The jube-jues lasted almost the entire week at work and then someone added a box of Pot of Gold to the cabinet.  This did not help my struggles.  The little voice said "you can just have one" but I know the next time I walked by I would think the same thing regardless of whether or not I ate one before.  I think that's something that bothers me the most is that I resist temptation regularly and feel the scale should reward me and when it doesn't I get cheesed off.  Resisting should be reward enough, as I've said many times, I'm a work in progress not with just my weight but my mental thinking as well.

This coming week should be pretty uneventful.  Stay the course and I will make it to the end and move on to maintenance.  I will do it.

Weekly weigh in - All According to plan

This week I weighed in down 1 pound to 186. I did some reading on the internet and decided to change things up slightly this week and give a small cut to my daily protein intake. I am at the moment working on a bit of a metabolic cycle test. Trying to take the mass I have aquired and not add more, but sculpt what is there.

After some reading that is the strategy I took and I can already see a bit of a change in the definition. After a few weeks of this routine I will go and add more protein in again. From what I have read I have to keep my body guessing a little bit, so that it continues to view itself in a state of "challenge". So the plan is to toggle between metabolic maintenance and adding muscle mass, so that I get the best definition of what is there.

I am aiming to be sculpted and defined and its definitely starting to be the case. I am still increasing my intensity every week. I also shifted the day which I do that. One of the more interesting facets of the human body is its tendency to adapt to activity. So I am throwing a few monkey wrenches into the mix and trying to inject a little chaos.

One thing is for sure there is no stopping this now. The train is rolling and I like the results.

Saturday Weigh In - Steady Progress, personal weirdness

My weigh in yesterday was 187 pounds.  I know this is 5 pounds below the top of the mark for a normal BMI for my height. I also know that BMI doesn't factor in muscle mass. What I am finding interesting is I almost have an anxiety about going above 192 pounds. I have maintained my normal BMI status for over a year and although I am aiming for more muscle, and logically I know that could mean I am over the normal BMI range. It still makes me feel slightly odd.

Muscular people are more often then not over that range, I know this to be true logically. I think its just a comfortable head space I have developed being there. I know I am still wearing medium t-shirts and still have a 34" waistline so really all of this is in my head. Its just a strange feeling.

It doesn't mean I am going to stop, or go on some goofy crash diet to cut weight. I fully intend to reach my goal of a better body. I think I just have to adjust my thinking when it comes to BMI. I really have to re-enforce the fact that muscular people are very often slightly into what it would consider to be overweight.

Perhaps the solution is to find a better scale, or just start to spend a bit more time looking in the mirror and realizing how much better I look. I am sure I will get there. its just a slight period of personal weirdness.

Weekly Weigh-in and Reflection

Well it's that time of the week again, time for the weekly weigh-in.  So with no further ado here we go.....

This week I am down 2 pounds making my total weight loss 135 pounds!  That's another 5 pound sticker for my success board.

I am happy to see the scale finally showing what I've been seeing in the mirror and in my clothes.  The new weighted vest is definitely working!  My shirt is soaked by the time I'm done my 57 minutes!  I have a game plan to get me to the end with the vest, 2 weights every 3 pounds lost.  I may still need to change up my workout routines to keep pushing myself to the end.  I can see the end coming and am starting to get a bit excited.  It will happen when it's supposed to.

This week was challenging because it was a very busy week.  Had errands or appointments every day after work this week.  That meant for later dinners and less time relax and recover from the day at work.  I typically like to eat dinner between 5:00 pm and 5:30 pm but when I have stuff after work it get to be 6:00 pm or 6:30 pm before we sit down to eat and eating too close to going to bed isn't the best thing.  I'm hoping this week coming will be quieter after work and I am able to have dinner at a better time.

The other challenge this week was the tub of jube-jues someone brought into the office.  They use to be one of my weaknesses.  It was difficult to walk by them and ignore them calling to me.  They were unfortunately on my route to the bathroom and passed them many times thanks to all the water I drink in a day!  I am happy to say that I was able to resist  the call of the jube-jues and feel better for not having given in.

This week coming should be much better for my routine.  I have not appointments after work and other than regular grocery shopping stuff.  No lunches or dinner outs this week.  A nice quiet and boring week in store.  I think I'm going to like it! 

Saturday Weigh-in - A Day Late

I am a day late in writing this, please forgive me.

As of my weigh-in yesterday I was 133 pounds down.  Yep, that's right, no change yet again.  A tad frustrating to say the least.....

I am in the home stretch and am being tested slightly I feel.  The last bit of weight has been with me the longest and is proving to be the most stubborn to leave.  I will continue to push forward.  Yesterday Munkee and I went out on the hunt for an adjustable weighted vest.  We were able to find one and I have come up with a game plan to add to weights to the vest every three pounds lost.  I wore the vest for the first time this morning and when I was done my workout I found my tank top was soaked.  Guess it's going to work.  We had thought we found some heavier adjustable weights for our ankles and wrists but when we got home we found that they just won't work.  I was unable to get either the ankle or wrist weights tight enough to stay on.  We will keep looking but we may have the best options for our ankles and wrists.

This week at work I was on course for a couple of days and challenged myself to walk from the 2nd floor to the 7th floor (I'm currently walking 3 to 7).  I was able to it but was out of breath and my legs were screaming a bit when I finally got up to the 7th floor.  It was encouraging to see that it will be possible but will give it a bit more time before I do that regularly.

Yesterday was my sister's birthday and I helped plan a party for her.  It was a challenging evening as there was lots of yummy food out for everyone to enjoy.  Munkee and I opted to eat our regular dinner and after snack instead of tempting fates and trying to limit and have a few things at the party.  I kept myself busy organizing the food and ensuring there was enough out.  My sister has been an amazing support to me in my quest and is always quick to brag about me.  I find one of two things happens when people find out how much weight I've lost 1) they congratulate me and move on or 2) the offer their opinions on what you should be doing.  There are so many different options and opinions and suggestions on the best way to lose weight.  I smile and nod as I'm given their suggestions.  My best advice in this area is if you've found something that is working for you and you are happy, then leave it alone.  You can drive yourself crazy trying to stay up with the latest fads and trends.

This week should be pretty uneventful.  Regular work week and no big plans for the week now that my sister's party is done.

Saturday Weigh In - Steady Progress

Today I weighed in at 186 pounds. I am really enjoying the difference in my arms. It sounds like a small thing but having some more muscle definition in that area really makes me feel less "dorky".

I suppose that doesn't change the man that bears the arms though. I still am the same videogame obsessed superhero movie loving star wars geek. I think though I have gone a long way to ensuring my longevity.

Yesterday I suprised Bee by cleaning the house top to bottom. Now that the christmas stuff has been put away for the year we were suffering from a condition that appears to be annual. I call it fake needleitis. I think the stuff from garlands and christmas trees is second only to glitter in its tenacity.

The big difference I noticed is after finishing I wasn't sweaty and super tired. The old 280 pound version of myself would have been done for the day, and likely required a nap. These are the real reasons behind getting in shape and eating better. It is definitely nice to fit better into clothes and look nicer in them, but the real benefit is feeling better. Everything has changed from getting out of bed in the morning, travels up and down the stairs, and my general energy levels. My joints in my knees and hips no longer ache constantly, and I no longer require pain medication except in extreme circumstances.

Looking good is one thing, feeling great is truly the best reward.

Weekly Weigh-in and Reflection

So it's Saturday again, time for my weekly weigh-in.

As of this week I am down 133 pounds.  Yep, I stayed the same this week.

I'm ok with this.  This week I added more stairs to my daily climb to my office so I'm thinking I added some more muscle.  I know I ate properly and was much better at weighing and measuring my food.  It happens, I'm not always going to lose weight, the body adjusts and reacts as you change things.  As long as you know you're doing what you're supposed to be doing it will happen when it's supposed to.  At least that's what Munkee tells me when I'm about to throw the Wii balance board out the window.

This week was pretty good.  Adjusting to the extra climb up the stairs.  Having not done that for a few weeks with holidays and adding a bit more stairs was interesting.  My goal is to eventually do all the way up to the 7th floor.  I will get there.

Food was easier this week as routine was back to normal.  When I'm working Munkee does all the breakfast and lunch prep for the next day so that takes the temptation away from me to "add a bit more".  There were a few later dinners this week due to running around which wasn't an issue when I was off.  I have to realize not everything is always going to happen at the same time every day and let it go.  I am doing what I'm supposed to and it will happen when it's meant to.

Next week should be just as uneventful as this week.  Nothing much planned for next week at all.  Just returning back to normal routine.  Yep, it's revealed, I lead a very boring life!  And I love it!

Saturday Weigh In - Not too much to report

I stayed the same at 185 this week, which works fine for me. This week I added in another set of dips and pushups with a wider hand position. My hope is that I can work slightly different areas of the muscle and continue to sculpt them further.

This journey is a continuous one. I have layed the groundwork over the last year and a half that I intend to follow for the rest of my life. I am not doing some sort of diet to get in shape then slowly slinking back into old patterns. This was a distinct change in how my life functions.

It is a permanent change. Eating better and keeping active really is a good way to promote longevity. As much as I dislike the actual act of working out I know I feel worlds better for doing so. It is something I never intend to stop doing.

Back to Routine

So today was back to routine.  I back to work today after two weeks off.  I had an amazing two weeks off but it's nice to get back to the routine.

I mentioned in my Saturday post that I am now working on the 7th floor of my building and that posed a bit of a challenge as I was only use to walking up to the 4th floor and am worried about passing out in the stairwell if I tried to walk all the way up to the 7th floor.  So this morning I took the elevator up to the 3rd floor and then walked the stairs up to the 7th floor.  In a month or so I will move down to the 2nd floor and then finally do all the way up to the 7th without an elevator.  I thought about trying the entire thing but was not ready to try today.

My food routine didn't really change much over the holidays.  Ate at slightly different times and had to be a bit more flexible when eating at other people's  houses.  I did find I was picking a bit more and adding "just a couple of more" in when measuring things out.  I know I was still able to continue to drop my weight and I wasn't going crazy with things that are outside what I normally ate, it was just a little extra.  I am saying this out loud as I need to stop this or I am afraid because I was able to have "just a couple of more" and continue to lose weight that I will try a bit more and not enjoy the results.  So it's back to weighing and measuring and being more honest with my portion sizes again.  If I push that limit too much it could end badly and I refuse to go backwards.  Phew, I feel better now.

Saturday Weigh-in and Weekly Reflection

So it's Saturday again, that means time to see what the scale says...

I am down another pound for a total of 133 pounds off!

I am happy with still moving forward in my quest.  I am trying to be patient with the rate at which I'm loosing as this stuff has been with me the longest and will be the most stubborn to leave.  I have issued them their eviction notice and they will leave, I just have to be patient and continue forward.

I picked up my favorite issue of People magazine this week, the issue that features people who have lost half their weight.  I always find it an inspiring issue.  It's nice to see other people going through the same struggles and coming out on the other side.  It's an issue I tend to keep around.

This week was the last week of my holidays.  We stayed pretty quiet because I caught the cold that was going around the family at the various gatherings.  I must say it's the first time I've been sick in almost two years.  Not the way I wanted to spend my time off but force me to take it easy and maybe that's what I needed.

Back to work on Monday.  I changed jobs just before holidays and am now working on the seventh floor of the building.  This is challenging my resolve to only use the elevator at work.  Down I am fine.  Up I am afraid I will pass out on the fifth floor and never be found!  I'm thinking I could take the elevator to the third floor and then walk up to the seventh and then as I get use to that I can then move down to the second floor and then finally walk up to the seventh floor.  That's the plan.

Routine will fully return on Monday and the week should be fairly smooth.  Fingers crossed!

Saturday Weigh In - Milestone achieved

This morning the scale read back 185.5 which is pretty cool. It means that since I have started shooting for muscle gains, I have added 10 pounds of lean muscle to my frame. It really is starting to show in how clothing sits and with what I see in the mirror.

I set my new goal for the year to get even stronger and more muscular aiming for a body much like Chris Hemsworth. I should mention I am not aiming for his "Thor" body as that is well.. around 25 pounds more muscle than I have now, and probably required him to eat an ocean of fish and chicken.

I am sure if I really wanted to I could do that but I am aiming more for his offtime physique. Which is the picture I posted last blog. Its more within reason and likely wouldn't require me to cause mass extinction to fuel my protein needs.

I have been thinking lately about adding some sort of weight training in the more traditional sense to my workouts. I am still torn about it because it goes against one of my old nerdy predjudices. I think I used to word it "Only dumbasses own dumbbells" or something to that effect.

I think I have hit the realization that I would need something to that effect or heavy duty resistance bands to reach the goal I have set for myself. I will put more thought to it and see how things shape up without it. I kind of like the idea that most of this physique is generated from my own bodyweight and exercises driven mostly from a videogame console. To me there is something poetically right about that.

A New year has begun

I don't make new years resolutions anymore as I have found that its almost assured that I will fail to keep it. I accomplished quite a lot this past year. I finally am at a point in my life where I am happy with my body. That doesn't mean I am finished and can relax, in fact the opposite is true.

I am going to keep moving forward this year sculpting my body and intend to aim for something similar to this.

I know what you are thinking, why Chris Hemsworth. Well its really quite simple he is around my height. and although he is rather muscled I don't think he uses/abuses steroids to my knowledge. I think its attainable. 

I have been building muscle steadily since I began that process a while ago. My aim is to be in somewhat similar condition by the time my 40th birthday rolls around next december 22nd. 

One thing this journey has taught me is to have a goal. Originally I just wanted to lose some weight, part way through I decided to hit a 22bmi, and I met that goal. Once I had hit that goal I aimed to maintain that weight for 6 months, and succeeded. Now I am on the path to adding muscle, and I need a finish line to visualize. I see no reason not to aim high and shoot for the stars (no pun intended) I have come this far, so why not.

As Jedi Master Yoda once said "Do or Do Not there is no Try"